Friends Just Seem to Happen
- May 7
- 4 min read
By Frank Weber
Copyright ©2026
I’ve noticed that true friends will always manage to find each other no matter where they’re at in life or where they’re at in the world.
That has always been the case…at least in my experience.
It’s not something that you can really force and make happen.
That just doesn’t work.
Those forced friendships never last for very long.
They usually end up with folks being at odds with each other…and usually without anyone really knowing ‘why’.
A couple simple rules come to mind.
First Rule: Figuratively speaking, no one should EVER go to party that did NOT invite them.
Take a minute to figure out ‘why’ you’re going or even want to go.
Was it you or was it someone else?
You could end up in trouble otherwise.
I remember one night, many years ago, one of the guys in our group knew about a party from someone he knew. Already sounded like trouble, but we all piled in the car and went anyway.
It was a good ol’ ‘Romanesque’ party to say the least! That’s usually my kind of place, but I never felt at ease.
And I wasn’t the only one that felt that way.
It only took a few minutes for me to decide to leave. The other guys wanted to stay, but I wasn’t feeling anything close to good, so I made for the door.
As I was walking out the door, a girl in the hallway cocked her hips and asked me why I was leaving. It turned out it was her party.
I said, “Thanks for letting us in, but I’m just not feeling it.”
She said, “I never invited YOU in the first place! I never said I wanted YOU here!”
I just smiled at her, laughed a little to myself and left.
I came to find out that she had a thing for the guy that talked us all into going, but she didn’t want me or this other guys there. Her and her friends had designs on a couple of our ‘friends’, but not us. She was pissed!
And I never saw her or anyone else from that party again.
I saw a couple of my ‘friends’ for a few years past that, but even those friendships dropped-off, one-by-one. We were all just kids.
Second Rule: No one should EVER stay at a party that does NOT want you.
I remember one cold, rainy New Year’s Eve back when I was in the eighth grade.
My closest ‘friend’ at the time was going to a party and brought me along with him.
The party was going on in home of a guy he knew – who was in his thirties – and his wife and all of their kids and friends.
It was a party right out of an biker movie.
I kept reminding myself that HE invited me, not them, so I was more than a little on edge.
You can just imagine the characters walking around that place that night.
There were three HUGE bikers in the kitchen passing one big-ass water bong between them.
The scene would have been intimidating, even if I was an adult and not a 14-year-old kid.
But when we walked in, I saw nothing but nods – the kind of nod that welcomes you into the room. Before I knew it, the guy closest to me reached out his hand and handed me the bong.
He even held his lighter on the bowl for me.
I took a monster hit.
Apparently, they all got a kick out of me, because the four of us stood around in the kitchen, bullshitting and smoking and drinking beers for a good hour.
Then I walked out into the front room and literally ran into Ronnie, the guy that lived in the house, and his wife Karen. Both standing around smoking piles of cigarettes and disappearing beers faster than I could see them go down.
It was their party.
Ronnie tossed me a beer and jumped straight into a conversation with me as though we had been talking for hours.
After a while he paused and said, “I’m trying but I don’t remember who you are. Who you here with?”
Then they both got quiet and waited.
“Eric brought me. I hope that’s ok.”
“Fuck yeah, it’s ok! I just couldn’t remember. You’re ok!”
And just like that the tension was broken and we were back to laughing and talking and drinking.
Strange thing to me was that even though I was never invited, I was still wanted and welcomed in their home by them and everyone in it.
After the girl that got pissed at me for showing up without being invited by HER, Ronnie and Karen threw me for a loop.
But it was a good cause for thought.
The scariest looking folks (to a 14-year-old, anyway) were the friendliest and most accepting and welcoming toward me. I felt safe and comfortable around all of them.
Imagine if I had walked in like I didn’t care and they did NOT want me there?
That’s a pretty scary thought to me even now.
So, over the years, the rules became more of a cautionary guideline.
Before jumping in where I might not belong…or might not even be wanted…I always consider who my friends really may be. Are they my friends at all or are they just some people I’ve met?
So, I learned to trust myself first and foremost.
People that SHOULD be acquainted and people that DO become true friends will find each other without ever having to look. It just happens.
But I’ll be damned if I can ever spot it until after it’s all said and done!
Comments